sometimes you have to just {hang on}...

Well, life has thrown me for a loop...last time i blogged i was headed off to Sunny San Diego...It was the world's fastest trip...i left Thursday at 1:00 pm and was home back in Utah Friday at 1:00 pm...24 hours...

Life...Sometimes, well honestly most of the time we can't control it...i am a control freak btw...So letting go and giving up control is not an easy thing for me...But...this time i am having to let go of the control and just hang on...The Lord is in control of this one...

So let me back up a bit...

I left Thursday with all my kits packed in my suitcases...tied with hot pink tulle...{cute right?} i got to San Diego as planned...i was hesitant in going for some reason...i LOVE San Diego, i was excited to teach with my new paper...i was excited to spend time with April...See friends...Make new friends...but as Meg drove me to the airport i was a little sick to my stomach...worried about Brooke who had had the flu all week...but i went...i had committed...

When i arrived in San Diego the sun was shining...i sat at the curb with my luggage, waiting for April to pick me up face to the sun...LOVE that...LOVED the idea of getting some sunshine...

April picked me up and we drove to her home...i loved it...It was so "April" loved seeing the kids...Talked to Thomas about rare squishies...He read a book to me...we ordered pizza and just talked...no big plans...just hangout...loved it...

i spoke with Meg who was going to take Brooke to the Doctor because she just wasn't getting any better, we thought she might need an antibiotic or something...right...

Well, as soon as Meg got her to the Doctor's office and they took Brooke's blood pressure they called 911 and an ambulance to her directly to the hospital...Her body was shutting down...Her blood pressure was so low and her white blood count was way too high...Scary...Meg called me...i was sick...

sick that i hadn't stayed home with my girl...listened to the promptings that i had felt...

lesson learned...listen to your heart...listen...

i got on the first plane Friday morning...i have been at my girl's bedside...i have prayed...i have watched my girl struggle to breathe...i have stroked her hand...rubbed her feet...listen to her sleep...covered her in a cheetah snuglie...and prayed...

She was in the ICU Friday, Saturday and part of Sunday...Attached to machines to feed her, breathe for her...make her well...

Today she is breathing on her own...not even oxygen...she sleeps...i sit and i watch my girl...i pray...i am grateful...she is getting well...the swelling is going down, her kidneys are working again, her lungs are on the mend...she has pink in her cheeks...

So i let go of the control...i just hang on...

i have said it before and i am sure i will say it again...life is a roller coaster...up...down...sometimes we ride with our hands in the air...and sometimes we just hang on for dear life with fear...

this weekend has been a white knuckle kind of hang on...

my girl...she has pink in her cheeks again...

thank you for all your prayers...i believe in prayer...i know it works...i believe in miracles...this weekend has been filled with both...

kiss kiss

m

Comments

[angie dunn]

ohmigosh, how scary! so relieved to hear she's doing better, margie!

i believe in prayer too....mine continue for brooke & your family. ♥

[Suzelle Kasaian]

God is good.......

[Emma Tandy]

I love reading your blog and twitter I have been praying for brooke and I'm so glad she's on the mend, it does not matter how old you are you still need you mum when your not well, mine are 2 and 8 my 8 year old has been very poorly over the years and when it's out of your control it's hell she's very lucky to have a wonderful mum like you, make sure you take care of your self as well because she'll need you when she gets home take care and I'm so pleased for your family that brooke is getting better emma xx

[Angie Lucas]

Margie, this is such a beautiful post. You made me cry. I'm so glad to hear your sweet daughter is getting better.

[jeanne]

I am so sorry that you were far away when everything got worse. So very grateful that your sweet girl is healing and getting stronger. I can not even imagine how stressful this has all been. Do they know what actually caused everything?

[jenn]

Still sending prayers my friend

xo

[Cheri Vallery]

MArgie as I read your post with tears streaming down my checks I said a quick prayer for Megan and for YOU .. that you get through this OK .. there is no describing the feeling of total helplessness when we cannot FIX our babies .. I am so happy that she is getting better every minute and your whole family will continue to be in my prayers

[Linda L3]

Margie, bless your heart! What a stressful, scary time you've had. I'm so glad your Brooke is on the mend, and that you were able to get home to be with her when you needed to. Please, please don't beat yourself up for going to San Diego, girlfriend! You can't know when life is going to throw you a curveball. You handled it all with such grace and love, and your daughter is fortunate to have such an amazing mom to be there for her. No doubt, she'd say the same. Now... relax, have some cocoa and breathe, honey! It's all uphill from here. ♥

[Bec_Kilgore]

I am so glad Brooke is doing so much better! I have been following you on Twitter and Facebook. Prayers and good thoughts for y'all.

[Rhonna Farrer]

praying.
love you.
love brooke.
miracles are real.
thank heavens!
xox
R

[Megan]

scary but glad she it on the mend

[Lynn]

Glad to hear your daughter is getting better. Thought & prayers are with you all.

[Emily T.]

I hope she gets well soon...

...in my thoughts!

[kim schroeder]

Wow what a scare! Glad to hear that Brooke is getting better - sending more positive thoughts and prayers that her recovery is quick!

[Carrie]

Prayers for a continued speedy recovery! xoxo

[Peggy Lee Baker]

Oh my thank you for sharing I will keep you and her and your family in my prayers. Hope

[Frani Garcia]

Sotty to hear about Brooke,
she will get better.
Now you need to make sure you don't get sick, she needs YOU.
Prayers coming your way.
Love you, Frani

[Lisa]

Oh my goodness, what an ordeal for you! I am so very glad she is getting better. I cannot even imagine what that must have been like for you Margie!

[Elaine Allen]

Margie -

Keeping all of you in my heart and prayers.

Elaine Allen

[Jill]

I am so happy to hear she is on the mend. I do not know you, admire your Scrapbooking love, but I have been praying for you and your girly!

Regarding the control stuff, I too try to control too much. I read this book about a year ago and haven't been so bad since: http://product.half.ebay.com/The-Control-Freak_W0QQtgZinfoQQprZ1662035

[JaYne]

Lots of prayers being said, so glad she's getting better. No matter how old they get they are still our babies aren't they?

[stephenie]

Okay girls... The prayers for continued recovery on... I am sick that I was out of it the end of last week and had no clue... I am praying as I type to be honest!!! Big hugs and happy thoughts of health and recovery are on the way!!!!!

[meme]

I so agree "life is a roller coaster" and the white knuckles times makes us stronger and teaches us to listen to our instints a little more. I always say follow your heart and follow your gut feelings, they are 9 out 10 times right. Hang in there, sounds like she is on the mend.
Hugs!!!!

[Helle Greer]

Hey Girlie,
So glad to hear that your daughter is doing well.
That is so scary when it is your children, that get sick.
Take good care.

We all missed you here at Paper Tales, but will be looking forward to have you come on a different date.
We sold out of you paper already, it if flying off the shelf's ;-)
Big Hugs,
Helle

[Gloria L.]

So happy that all has worked out, I know it was scary for your whole family. God bless!